Monday 4 March 2013

Keeping the faith

I truly believe that whatever happens, however much of it happens, however difficult at the time it is, nothing happens that we cannot cope with.  It is my mantra, my one personal truth, and it has got me through some tough times.  It does, however, seem to like to test me.  As I've mentioned before, it's becoming a family joke (the not so funny kind) that, when the lovely boyf goes away for work, the proverbial hits the fan.  At the beginning, I did not cope, admittedly it usually involved me being flat on my back ill and still managing the house, but I was not gracious in my not coping!  As time has gone on I've done it, I've got stronger and healthier and cope.  Yes, there is still the odd moment of ugly weepy, but at least I'm not crazy ladying it anymore!

All that said, I can't help still wondering when is it going to stop; he gets on a plane and my first thought is "what now?"  It used to be the 11yo and I with various variations of flu.  Then it was the house and work and now it seems to be our animals.  There was trouble with the chooks and the small furries.  Most recently it was Megs and daily vet visits following the op on her less lumpy leg and this time it is my little Finn.  He's at the vets now, on a drip, while they try to find out why he is vomiting blood.

So, breathe deep, trust that it will be ok and keep the faith.  It is the last leap of faith I guess, to truly trust.  Maybe when I have learnt not to ask the question, I will no longer need the lesson.

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